In Honor of My Daughter's Birthday

       I  remember the day I found out you were on your way. That was the day that changed my life forever. It was the day I stopped putting me first and knew that a great thing would grace this world. Then you were here. The most beautiful thing I ever laid my eyes upon, a head of gorgeous black hair, the most beautiful, bright eyes, and fat rolls everywhere! The cutest smile to every shine on the earth. I held you in my arms and knew you were special.

As you grew you reinforced every thought I had the day you were born. As impossible as it sounds, the most beautiful baby became more beautiful. That precious smile was ever present. The smallest and most simple things made you happy. You never fussed and you never cried. You were mama's little helper.

Not only were you smart, but talented as well. You danced your way into the hearts of everyone you came into contact with. You are a shining star.

Now my baby is growing up and turning into a beautiful, smart, talented, determined young lady. It's more fun to hang out with friends than it is with Mama now. Just remember you are always going to be my baby and I will always love you more than life itself.

You once said as we passed a movie theater marquee "One day my name will be on that board. I'm gonna be a star and everyone will know my name". You are already a star in my eyes and one day soon the whole world will know your name.

I love you.

Mama

I hope that every wish you make comes true and know that Daddy and I will always support you and have your back in everything you do. 

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You Can't Fix Stupid

It is a sad state of affairs when you come to the realization that as a whole, it seems the population is dumbing down. Stupid comes in various shapes, sizes, and forms. I will give children a pass since children learn from their parent's example, and well they just aren't old enough to know better in most cases. However if you are over the age of 18 you don't get a free stupid pass from me.

Stupidity is never more evident than on the highway, in Wal-Mart and sadly on a college campus.

Let's examine this more closely. First if you are on the highway, hell any road for that matter, and there is a car beside you and you look and SEE this car beside you, that is clue number one you don't just change lanes right then. Your second clue you shouldn't have done it is me laying on my horn and giving you the finger. Oh and don't think I won't follow you either and stop when you stop to tell you off. That is clue number three. Also, you know 9 times out of 10 you can turn right on red when the traffic is clear so TURN when the traffic is clear. And another thing. If you are in a turning lane and there is a green light and no traffic coming from the opposite direction, you can go! You don't have to wait for the little green arrow to tell you, you can. The green circle will do just fine. And, don't blow your horn for a car to go as soon as the light turns green. You know there are mechanics involved to getting a car to move forward-it doesn't do it automatically at a green light.

Now the stupidity you find in Wal-Mart. You can find it easier than anything else in Wal-Mart that's for sure! All one has to do is enter the parking lot. After you dodge about four or five toddlers roaming freely in the parking lot with a mother screaming over her shoulder at them to hurry up-WITHOUT TAKING THEM BY THE HAND IN A VERY BUSY PARKING LOT WITH MOVING VEHICLES-you know you have entered the land of the stupid. Then you have the actual store. Don't ask a greeter anything-I mean anything. They look at you like you have sprouted a second head or something. Then you have little Johnny screaming for a toy across the store and his mother screaming even louder at him to shut up because everyone can hear him. Yeah, Ma, everyone can hear you too. But this is the biggie. You are in a checkout line. You know that payment is expected at the conclusion of your check-out. Therefore it would make sense to have your wallet/checkbook/credit card in hand BEFORE the cashier finishes ringing up your items, loading them into the buggy for you, and telling you your total. I would think so. But noooo. You decide to wait until all of that is done before putting your purse (which is usually ugly anyway) on the counter, pulling out everything you own, digging around to find whatever source you will use to pay for your items, and then finally paying. Then everyone has to wait for you to put all five thousand items back into your ugly purse before you will take the receipt and get the heck out of the way! And this is usually in the Express lane too!

Now stupid is also evident in a college classroom. When someone doesn't know who Condellezza Rice, the state governor, hell  who the University Chancellor is--you do not belong in a college classroom. You are taking a seat that someone with more than two brain cells could actually use. Secondly if you think there are more than one species of humans, you don't need to be in a college classroom. If the biggest thing in your life is how drunk you are going to get tonight and hot that fraternity guy across the aisle from you is, you don't need to be in a college classroom. And finally if you are 19-20 years old and think it is cute to sit and twirl you hair, talk as loud as you can, and constantly have to discuss the deep significance and relevance of Orlando Bloom's "hotness" while smacking your bubblicious-you don't need to be in a college classroom, at least not with me if you don't want your feelings hurt.

So, in conclusion, "no you cannot fix stupid". However you can SHOOT them and hopefully get em all!  (That last part is a total joke by the way!).

Meet Roxie

Roxie, with the long black hair and the flashing eyes. 

     She has always marched to the beat of her own drum and became the outcast in the process.  Preferring haunting goth music over the Billboard Top 40 she was ridiculed and called names by those around her, including her own mother.  Roxie isn’t your stereotypical “goth girl” however.  She has an infectious laugh, a beautiful smile, a loving and kind nature.  She channels the negative energy thrown her way into her creations—designing and sewing her own clothing, accessories, and her dolls. 

     Yet Roxie hides a secret beneath her long sleeve shirts and ankle length skirts.  Each harsh word and ugly name she has been called has left physical scars on her body.  Sent to Sentience by her mother in an attempt to “make her normal”, Roxie finds herself in a group with other girls who like her struggle to survive in a world that breaks them down at every opportunity. 

     Very different, but a common thread among them, they form a bond.  But is it enough? 

Broken Dolls: The Dead Doll—Roxie’s Story is the second in the Broken Dolls series

Broken Dolls Teaser

“You know when I drop a plate and it breaks I tend to throw it in the trash.  Can’t do that with folks though.  They break and we try our best to fix ‘em.  Some folks is easier to fix than others.  And when you start fixing ‘em you have to remember they have cracks still and that makes ‘em just a little bit more fragile and you can’t be as rough as before with them.”

            “I guess.”  Delilah wasn’t exactly sure what Susie was talking about.

            “Take you girls.  Each one of you is like a little doll.  Dolls get rips, tears, and if they are glass ones they can crack.  You can sew them up or glue them back together but they are just a little weaker in those places.  They can still be strong and tough but you still have to love them and be gentle with them."

Random Musings on Tennyson's "Lady of Shallot"

     Tennyson’s The Lady of Shalott is a poem that can be read a couple of different ways.  It can be seen as a view of what happens when one doesn’t look at reality regularly and then when they do, they are faced with a reality they cannot handle.  For so long, the Lady has viewed the world through the mirror giving her a skewed sense of reality.  When she finally sees the world as it truly is, she faces death.  Does she die because of a “curse” or is it simply she cannot handle reality?  As the reader, it is up to us to decide.  There is no right or wrong answer.

            One can also look at this from the feminist standpoint; something Tennyson later wrote other poems about and seemed to encourage women’s rights.  In the time period of this poem when a woman tried to assert herself, went against the norm, was not content to be the “angel of the house” she was often deemed as “mad”.  The result was confinement, separation from society.  Is this what the Lady has done?  Did she dare to defy society’s norm for women of the time and as a result she has been locked away in the tower.  The fact that society does not look upon her, rather they hear her singing can be seen as a support to this theory.  It is a story legends are made of; the crazy lady in the tower no one can see but can hear her song.  It is similar to the old haunted house tales when children are little and there is a rickety, run down house on the street.  When she finally leaves the confinement and inscribes her name on the boat as “Lady of Shalott”, it just proves she has lost her true identity and become what society has made her.  She has become dehumanized; she has lost all sense of who she once was.

            Is this the correct theory, the correct reading of the poem?  One cannot be sure.  Only Tennyson can say what his true intentions were when writing this great piece of literature and he is not here to tell us.  We must make of it what we will and come to our own conclusions.  That is one of the great things about literature; so much of it is left up to the reader’s interpretation and dissection.

Excerpt from Broken Dolls: Delilah's Story (chapter one)

The mid-day sun was shining bright on the lake. The red, orange, and yellow leaves of the trees looked like a forest fire reflected in the calm waters. A doe and her fawn peeked through the autumn foliage and eased their way to the cool waters for a drink. The sounds of the frogs croaking could be heard in the main room of the lodge. Occasionally the gentle sounds of the lake kissing the shore could be heard over the din of dishes rattling in the dining area.

Delilah sat in front of the large picture window, her knees pulled up and her feet on the large, plush sofa. She never saw the doe and fawn, nor did she hear the sounds of the frogs or lake. Instead she only saw the bright, white sterile gauze wrapped around each wrist attached to the clasped hands around her knees. The only sound she heard was the voice of her brother in her head telling her how stupid she was.

Just a little teaser for you guys.  Working tonight on more--so far I've gotten two more chapters in this particular book written as well as just some random stuff floating around in my brain.  I read a great quote today "Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia". ~E.L. Doctorow.  If that doesn't explain what it is like inside my head all the time with the different characters, ideas, voices tellings stories, etc then I don't know what does!  Hope everyone has a great weekend and as always happy writing!

Meet Delilah

Delilah knows what it is like to be alone. She has been alone since she was a young child. After the tragic death of her father and the incarceration of her mother she was placed in the care of grandparents who blame Delilah for her mother's incarceration and her late father for everything else. A victim of physical, verbal, and emotional abuse in her own home she has learned to shut the world out. Ridiculed and shunned at school, her only confidant is her rag doll, Annie.
After a failed suicide attempt, Delilah finds herself in a very specialized residential treatment facility for teens with severe emotional and mental problems with three other teen girls facing their own demons. Can she learn to trust? Can she let her guard down and allow people to care about her and allow herself to care for them?

Rag Doll: Delilah's Story is the first in the Broken Dolls series chronicaling the pain, heartbreak, and struggle to survive of four teenagers who, while from very different backgrounds and all with very different problems, find out they have more in common than originally thought

Short Story In the Works

Currently working on a short story based off a one act play I wrote a couple of years ago.  Hopefully will have it posted by tomorrow.  Been reading various habits of some of the most successful authors, and seriously considering a few.  Stephen King always writes ten pages a day, even on holidays.  Sounds like a good idea especially when one considers he has had over 300 pieces in print!  Now we know how he is able to always have a book on store shelves.  You go Stephen King (I love him by the way one of my favorite authors). 

Well back to work.

A New Age in Writing

I am an old fogey.  I love to read books, not a little electronic tablet that I touch and a new page appears but actual books with paper and binding glue and a jacket with a picture on the front and an author photo and bio on the back.  I love going into a bookstore and spending hours just walking around in all the different sections running my hands over the books, pulling interesting looking ones off the shelves, sitting in the floor in front of the tall shelves and just reading. 

I also love to write.  Sometimes what I write is just silly blurbs or rants on today's society but I love it.  My two passions merge with reading and writing when I work on my own pieces.  But I have noticed a trend lately, fewer and fewer people in the bookstores.  Are bookstores on their way to becoming a thing of the past thanks to the kindle, nook, facebook, blogs, and ebooks?  What does that mean for people like me who don't understand how to market myself in the techno world?

Will I soon have to put "Like me on Facebook and follow me on Twitter" after every thing I write?  How does one market themselves that way?  As an author have I become a business?  I just don't get it.

Welcome to a new age in writing.